For the last few weeks, I have been thinking about the story of Gideon in the book of Judges.
Like much of my reading in the Old Testament, this is another Sunday School Story. One I grew up hearing every year I went to children’s church. It is a familiar story about a man who really feels unworthy of a task that God has assigned to him. Defeating the army that has oppressed the people of Israel.
Judges 6:11 we first meet Gideon. He is hiding out in a winepress while threshing wheat because The Midianites would otherwise steal the grain from him. That is what they had been doing to the Israelites. The Bible describes them as locusts (Judges 6:5). So while he is secretly threshing, an angel of The Lord comes to him and tells him that Gideon will be the one to deliver Israel from their oppressors. Gideon is incredulous. He argues that he is the youngest son of the weakest clan of the tribe of Manasseh (Judges 6:15).
There is so much to unpack here. First is that he is the youngest in the family. The one with the least power historically. Then his family is the weakest in the tribe. So, that is another reason why he feels unworthy. FINALLY, he says he is the weakest in the tribe of Manasseh. In other parts of the Bible and prior to this story it is referred to as a “half tribe”. This is because it is not directly one of the 12 tribes descended from Israel (Jacob). Also because Manasseh, son of Joseph and grandson of Israel, was half Egyptian.
So Gideon gives all of these reasons why he can’t POSSIBLY be the one God has called on. He has listed his unworthiness factually. Not that he FELT unworthy, but these were the concrete pieces of info that he thought should disqualify him from the task that he has been called to. After this there is an exchange between the angel and Gideon and then the angel leaves. Gideon then builds an alter after he realizes he saw God and He gave him peace.
Then there is this really interesting event.
God tells Gideon to get two bulls. One is young and the other is seven years old. Both belonging to his father. He then instructs him to tear down the altar to Baal that his father had built along with a ceremonial pole to Asherah. Then He instructs him to build an altar on top of the spot of the idol altar and use the wood from the pole to burn the old bull as an offering to God.
Just like Gideon’s argument on his unworthiness, there is lot to unpack about this offering. So much of it mirrors his factual data about how God should not choose him for the call of freeing Israel.
First, Gideon selects bulls not belonging to him. They were his father’s. One could make the argument that indirectly they belonged to Gideon. Kinda. Much like the HALF Tribe of Manasseh. They were his...indirectly.
Second, TWO bulls are gathered by Gideon. Yet God wants the second and older bull sacrificed. In reading the Old Testament, I have only seen firstborn bulls (and typically young) bulls offered to God. On our farm, seven years is getting up there in years for a bull. So, the strength of the animal is not a factor to The Lord. Just like Gideon lamenting his weakness and is family’s weakness, it is not important to God here. Then, for God to accept the older bull is showing that He is not focused on birth order here. Gideon is not the oldest, he is the youngest. This second born, older bull is what God accepts and what he WANTS. Finally, they are all burnt on an altar in an unworthy place built on top of where Baal’s altar stood and using fire from the remains of an idol.
It is all in response to Gideon’s arguments. Like a point-for-point answer.
What a lovely and loving thing for God to do. He gives this man who is terrified and so unsure of the ability to carry this call, a tangible reply. He says “I accept the bull that isn’t really your property, but I want the one who is out of the birth order of worthiness, and on top of that it is probably weaker than the other one you picked out. Gideon, I am accepting YOU!”
It brings me to tears. This beautiful, kind, yet big answer to the questions posed.
I ask these questions all the time. “God, why me?” God, I can’t.” “God, I am just not THAT good!” I examine and argue to God my unworthiness.
I chewed on this passage so much. For weeks now. Just turning it over and marveling at this quiet, little part of a story I thought I knew so well. This magnificent kindness of God. I wonder how God has been arguing back to me my worthiness. How has He done it in what He asks me to do and what He asks me to give to Him. Am I paying attention, or do I build my altar on why I shouldn’t be called? Is God asking me to tear down that altar of doubt over why he would want me and use those pieces to give to Him my “yes”?
What if we all listened to why God said “yes” to us and what He has called us to do? As a matter of fact, let’s do that. Let’s tear down the altar of Why I Cannot and give our offering on the altar of His goodness.
This is so good Martha❤️