The other day I was sitting with my Bible study group, and we were chatting while waiting for the other women to arrive. One subject that came up was the seeming reluctance of the farmers to start planting, or sowing. It had been a tough couple of years so you can hardly blame the dragging of feet onto tractors. That specter of “why bother?” can loom large.
One of the ladies remarked on the passage in Psalm 126 where sowing is accompanied with weeping. I considered what she said. I am pretty sure I had heard this verse before.
The passage is found at Psalm 126:5-6. It says:
5) Those who sow in tears
shall reap with shouts of joy!
6) He who goes out weeping,
bearing the seed for sowing,
shall come home with shouts of joy,
bringing his sheaves with him.
This whole chapter is interesting because it talks about the captives being returned to their homeland. It is hopeful and joyful. But then the end. That last part. Verses 5 and 6.
I’ve been wrestling with that last part.
What does it mean to sow with weeping?
I have read commentaries by Spurgeon, and others going as far back as the 16th century. Looking up translations to find out what each word meant. What I was doing was midrash.
A very simple definition of this Jewish term is the exegetical studying and analyzing the Bible. Midrash means exposition or investigation. I think this should be a critical and major part of our Bible reading. When we interpret passages, we have to do so not in a way that is meaningful to ourselves, but as the intended meaning by the writer to the intended reader.
I think when we over-personalize the Bible, we can dismiss large parts of what God is telling us. We can simply decide that it doesn’t apply to me or to my situation and move on. When we read to learn about ourselves and miss learning about God and his character, we are missing the whole point.
That is how I read the Bible for most of my life. I only want to read about the triumphs, the victories, and when people get their prayers answered. I don’t want to read Lamentations. I don’t want to read about the bad times for Israel (unless I get to skim and skip to the rescue). I don’t want the bad stuff. All that time, I missed how God comforts His people in the midst of great sorrow. I also missed God’s justice and how the law works which meant I could never appreciate the weight of what Jesus took on when he became the sacrifice. I missed knowing that God understands my anger. I got the most incomplete and inaccurate picture of God because The Bible didn’t always apply to me. What a shame!
What I do now is ask “What is God trying to tell me about Himself here?” I then pray about a passage. I’ll read up on it. I’ll look at translations. I will midrash.
I get so much more out of my reading when I do. I lay me aside and learn about Him.
So, I am still wrestling with this passage, Psalm 126:5-6. Still praying about it and mulling it over. Wanting to understand the sowing and weeping and not skipping straight to the happy part of reaping with joy.
As I was talking it over with friends (which is another wonderful way to midrash) I kind of hovered over a landing spot. It seems that God understands the sorrow and the grief, maybe even the worry of putting our hope, our “seeds” into uncontrollable environments. There is a pain in sowing. Especially in biblical times where you could sometimes eat the grain you put in the ground. You are wholly and sadly trusting in a process you cannot control. God sees that and He knows that.
But maybe He is showing us that sad and even reluctant acts of trust can result in harvest.
I don’t know. That’s where I am hovering. That is where I am today. I am still praying and still waiting for God to help me stick the landing.
Note:
It feels very hard to leave this unfinished. This blog post has been sitting and sitting in my laptop. I get bothered that I haven’t come to an exciting or even polished and shiny conclusion. But I think God wants me to be ok with putting that out into the world. That our walks and understandings might meander at some points. I just think that God loves me coming back to him over and over for help. He’s not annoyed. He’s delighted by how my mind, our minds work. So, I just keep going back and talking it over with him. I invite you to do the same. Especially with scripture. It is Him telling us about Himself. He is the authority and He has a lot to say!